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lyrics

I feel like...
I'm wrestlin' my head again, out of the medicine
Don't wanna be like this and get in to it with my friends
The ones I love - The ones I trust
If you treat them like I did, I'd wipe you off this earth
So first and foremost.. I'm Sorry.. I'm tryna sort my *shhh out
But there's something in my soul that haunts me
I'm falling, constantly bawl, then I brawl with my thoughts
When I can't seem to stall them.. I'm calling..

OUT for a hand, I can't stand bein lonely
It's been months of nobody holdin' me
If only I could be strong
If only I could hold on, I know it won't be so long
If I could move on or go back
I'd leave that girl first with my heartbeat in tact
I'd return as the man that I was when ya met me
With a hunger for life and smiles a plenty but

Nothings working - What am I gonna do?
I'm still hurting - Gotta find a way to get through
While the world's still turning - Ain't nothing gonna change for you
I found that nothing's working - Ain't that the truth...

I don't know - I'm confused / Alone... Torn in two
Disown what I choose and blow every fuse
Every home has a bruise / There's no thing new
I roam for a clue throwing bones to the muse
Sowing stones for juice / I'm the holy accused
Owed my own dues but I'm broke so I'm screwed
Lucifer spoke... And so what!? I rebuked!
He nearly choked after seeing my ruse

I sold him the soles of my shoes for the souls of the youth
I hold the truth cuz the jokers refuse
Now I don't have the proof / I scoped and reviewed
Every note and every tune I've wrote, I wrote for you
I quit coke, booze and the little one's too
So I could focus my view on the quotes found in Jude
Like the hopes of the Jews, I'll be close to refuge
But the smoke that I consume has me cloaked in a tomb

Nothings working - What am I gonna do?
I'm still hurting - Gotta find a way to get through
While the world's still turning - Ain't nothing gonna change for you
I found that nothing's working - Ain't that the truth...

So nothing works, I'm certain that I still search
I don't always hurt it just comes in fits and spurts
It hits me first with a word that disturbs my nerves
Then makes me wanna binge and purge... On
Alcohol and drugs: the path of destruction
I ask GOD will I ever have a function
Anything? Something? Explain this combustion!
Exploding every second and exposing my suffering

... I'm running in circles
Every step I take, confronted by hurdles
I stumble on each, fall to the street
Knocked out my teeth and got blood on my knees
Please help me breathe, for I’ve been cut deep
I'm trying to rest but I can't find peace
I'm trying my best but your angels cheated me
They gave me false hope and false dreams and so it seems...

credits

from Apis Mellifera, released August 5, 2009

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Brent Lee Regan Bristol, UK

Brent Lee Regan is a Producer, Musician, Singer and Rapper whose music has been featured on multiple platforms including Radio, TV, Documentaries, DVD, Video Games and more. He has worked with many artists, film makers and companies which has garnered him a valuable reputation with Independent and Corporate clients. ... more

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